Safe and Warm

We've had no heat for the past few days. Our furnace decided to blow itself up, for no reason anyone can explain to me, and so it's been a mite chilly here. 

Of course it happened on a Saturday night so it's taken a few days to get the furnace examined and a new one ordered but as I type this, my new super-de-duper furnace is being installed.

Yesterday my daughter had a snow day and we built a fire, plugged in a few space heaters and we were fine. I did think about going to a hotel but I decided we could make do.

And we did great. I gathered all the house plants together near a space heater, put extra blankets on everyone’s bed, we all put on a few more layers and we used most of our firewood up in the main floor fireplace but that's okay.

But I must admit I've spent the last three days feeling unsettled.

After some reflection I think this feeling is due to the furnace being awry and the fact that my husband and oldest daughter are both away too.

Things at home just haven't felt right.

Every time I've walked into my house over the last few days I haven't been greeted with warmth and I’ve been disappointed.

And each night when I’ve gathered my family to a hot dinner there has been two of us missing and that too has felt wrong and unsettling.

And although I know that my children are going to grow up and leave me and that my husband is going to have to continue travelling for work somehow the lack of heat in my house has made me feel their absence even more.

I never truly appreciated before that the five of us being together and being warm is what I associate, both physically and emotionally, with security.

With being home.

And honestly? I've missed that warmth these last few days.