Tired Mama.com

It's vacation time!

I'm off to the cottage.

Three kids, the cat and a mini-van full of uh, stuff.

Do a sun dance for me, will ya?

Yippee! I think.

I'm going to a Coldplay concert tonight. Yep, I am.

I'm going with my daughter, her best friend and her best friend's mother.

I have no idea what I'm getting myself into but I'm off to charge up my cell phone because I hear they don't wave lighters at concerts any more.

I haven't been to a concert for a very long time. JT doesn't count as he's okay for old women like me.

Send me some hipness, please - I'm feeling kinda old right now.

Sigh.

I'm going on a summer holiday

Have I mentioned that my kids are slobs lately?

Have I mentioned that we've had too much rain here?

Yeah? Several times? Okay.

What else is going on? Um...

On Saturday we're leaving for a two week cottage vacation. This means my eldest will have to pull herself away from her texting and MSN'ing for a few weeks and my younger two will have to sort out how to play with each other for a few days without bickering.

Sounds like a good time.

Me? I'm taking a book and parking myself on a dock in a Muskoka chair. Tired Papa can BBQ and run the boat, I'm doing nothing.

Blissful, peaceful nothing.

With three kids in a small space.

And a forecast of rain.

Yeah.

I'll be sure to let you know how it goes. 

Quack

It's the end of July and we're still waiting for summer to arrive up here in southern Ontario.

It's been cold and wet here for waaaay too long. 

The up-side is that my gardens and lawn are all looking very green and lush.

The down-side is that I am looking very white and pasty pale.

Mother Nature? Give a fellow Mama a break, okay? Please send me some sun.

Thanks.

Home Messy Home

My house is a mess.

It's usually a mess but right now it's messier than normal because my kids are home on summer vacation and they are incapable of putting anything away or doing tidying of any kind.

I miss the days when I sent my kidlets off to school, cleaned up the house and then the house STAYED tidy until they came home.

During the school year I have six hours or so of a tidy okay, tidier house.

I miss that.

If it wasn't for the early start and the homework I might actually be wishing that school started again soon.

Really, really soon.

Sigh.

Deny, deny, deny.

It's still July for another week, at least where I live.

But when I went to Costco last week they were selling winter coats and CHRISTMAS wreaths.

My kids go back to school on September 8th. Yep, it's late this year.

But I'm already getting back to school notices in my mailbox.

Okay, I am a planner. I've taken the twelve step de-planning program but it didn't help. I usually get stuff done long before I need to but, even for me, this is getting ridiculous.

So, I'm covering my ears and closing my eyes and pretending I don't see any of these.

It can't hurt, right? 

Oh, if anything big happens while I'm in 'ignore mode' send me an e-mail and let me know, mkay?

Innocent

Did you know that if your nine year old announces to a group of your girlfriends that she saw her Mom and Dad in the pool in an 'inappropriate position', no matter how hard you protest that NOTHING was going on and NOTHING you were doing was inappropriate, no one will believe you?

Sigh.

Yeah, I finally did stop protesting and just sat and smiled.

But really, why exactly do we teach kids to talk?

Good Grief

I have a public service announcement.

Children everywhere, listen up!

It is NOT appropriate to EVER leave the house in your pajamas unless it is pajama day at school or the house is on fire.

Honest.

And it doesn't matter if your PJ's look like shorts and a t-shirt and it's warm outside.

And it doesn't matter that no one will care, you should care and your mother cares.

And it doesn't matter that you're wearing them under sports equipment and no one will know. Put a t-shirt and shorts on under the darn stuff.

Rolling out of bed and heading out to play in pajamas is just not cool.

There, my beloved offspring, you've now been told.

Sesh.

Filing

I'm filing tonight.

Yes, I do in fact know how to have a good time; I've just decided to file tonight instead.

You see the towers of paper in my office are threatening to fall over and possibly kill me so I thought I'd drag out the recycling bucket and some file folders and get it all sorted out instead of uh, dying.

I am having a problem though as I have lost the letters H, I and J from my filing system.

Aren't you impressed that I even have letters in little tabby things attached to file folders in file drawers in my office? You should be, this level of organization is usually well planned for by me, but rarely executed.

So, what was I saying? Oh yeah, the little white tags with the black letters on them  for H, I and J have gone missing from my office file drawers. The files that should be slotted neatly behind these letters are gone too.

This is perplexing. I have no idea where they are and it's confusing the whole system as I don't know what to do with the papers that should be filed under J, H and I.

I know I could just write out new tags but I want to know where the old ones have run away to. I mean how does this sort of thing happen?

You know what I'm thinking? I'm thinking it's way too hard to get organized. I think I may just have to push all the piles of paper under my bed instead.

I figure if I push all the papers under my bed then the papers just might push the lost socks out the other side of the bed and then it'll be a win-win.

Except of course all the H, I and J files will still be missing.

Sigh.

I'm rambling again.

As we were talking to a landscaping 'guy' last night, Tired Papa told him that August 15th would mark our three year anniversary living in this house.

Wow. We seem to be actually settling here.

Before we moved here we lived in the USA for seven years and then the UK for two years. My eldest was almost three when we moved to the States and my son was three weeks old. Yep, it was nuts.

But I digress. What occurred to me was the fact that my kids have lived longer outside of this country, our country, more than we've lived here.

It still seems weird to me that my kids have known more of another country then they do of their/my own. Of course my youngest was born in the USA so really she's lived longer in her country than mine.

Does it matter?

Not really. I loved living in the USA, and the UK and I'm thrilled to be home too.

It just hit me as interesting and a little bit weird. And it once again made me realize how fast time races on.

Oh, and it also made me realize that one of the first things I was going to do when I moved home (yes, three years ago now, Tired Papa!) was buy a new kitchen table. But we went shopping this weekend and I still don't have one.

I'm going out shopping for one again today. I think I'm going to have to go to one of those nice wood working places and have a table built to my specifications.

Based on my history of being completely unable to make a decision, when it comes to buying furniture, this whole process should be interesting and probably totally unproductive.

It really shouldn't be this hard. Yes, I am pathetic. But I'm blaming the warm weather. I mean who wants to be decisive when it's finally sunny out?

Let's go with that. The alternative is just too sad.

Furniture is just too hard to buy

Tired Papa hates furniture shopping and I am indecisive.

For the past eight years we've needed a new kitchen table. We haven't bought one because I can't decide what I want and then when I do decide Tired Papa won't come and look at it so we don't get anything. 

This week however I am determined to buy a new kitchen table.

If Tired Papa won't look at it and then doesn't like it after it's delivered then it's his problem, right? 

I figure it'll go really fast because I won't want to be inside shopping when I can be out in the sunshine.

At least I hope so. This holding my plate on my knee to eat dinner is starting to get me down.

Sigh.

Change is good.

My eldest daughter is getting her braces off soon. We've been told they should be coming off in August.

This is making my eldest very happy as they'll be off before she starts high school.

The other thing that makes this teen child happy these days is sleeping in.

But tomorrow my eldest has an orthodontist appointment at eight am. Yep, eight in the morning.

But in a few minutes she won't.

Because as I was thinking about what a rotten mood she's going to be in all day because she has to get up early for this appointment tomorrow, I decided I didn't want to deal with this.

So, in a few minutes I'm going to call and change the appointment to a different time next week so that we can see the orthodontist later in the day.

Sometimes it's just easier not to not set yourself up to be made miserable by your kids when you can avoid it, ya know? 

Been there. Done that.

When I was pregnant I was very sensitive to smells.

This past weekend when I went to get into our van there was a half eaten Wendy's lunch sitting in there that had been sitting in the sun for the full day.

I told hubby to get it out of there as the smell would make me sick.

It was awful.

Tired Papa laughed at me and asked me if I was pregnant.

While rolling my eyes at him I answered with much sarcasm that yeah, I was and that was the only reason I wanted that vile rotting bag of mush out of the van.

Tired Papa picked up the bag of food with two fingers, held his nose and threw it out. We then carried on our way with open windows.

What I didn't know was that my youngest daughter had been listening. My youngest also hadn't caught the sarcasm in my voice.

Yikes.

Um world? No matter what my youngest may have whispered to you? I am NOT pregnant.

Oh, and I don't ever intend to be pregnant again and I'm very content with that. Honest engines. Three kids are what I always wanted and I'm very happy that three beautiful healthy children are what I have.

That is with the exception of days like this when I want to gag one of them.

I'm going swimming instead.

As I dropped off one kid at a friend's house to play, took another to swimming lessons and dropped the third off at baseball camp this morning I found myself wondering where the lazy days of summer had gone.

I need to get groceries today, do laundry and my fridge needs cleaning out really badly - it's starting to smell.

We were away for the weekend so I have some unpacking to do too.

I have to get some writing done and I have the books to read for my fall courses all ready and waiting for me.

Sigh.

You know what? I think I'll go for a swim first, summer is just too short to spend time doing chores.

Oh, but if you're dropping by and want a drink? Just close the fridge door really quickly. Um, and you might want to hold your nose too.

Thanks.

Sun Tanning Mama

We're off to visit our friends at their cottage for the weekend.

The weather report is for sunny skies so I'm hoping we can sit by the beach, play in the water and maybe I'll even get a little colour on my pasty legs while we're there. 

I know I'm no longer supposed to suntan but I still do. I put lotion on to make sure I don't burn but I must admit the season for sunning is so short here I do try and get a little colour while I can. 

My eldest daughter on the other hand does everything she can to avoid getting a tan.

I know her way is healthier but I still remember laying out sun tanning with my friends when I was her age.

My friends and I would slather ourselves with baby oil, and then we would stretch out on huge lengths of tin-foil and bake in the hot sun all day long while we read trashy novels.

Yes, I will probably be diagnosed with skin cancer in a few years. 

But ah, the memories.

And you know what? I really do look better with a tan.

Sad, but true.

Sigh.